High School In Amsterdam Showers

When I was 14 in grade 9 at high school I was still pretty small in height and weight - still a boy in lots of ways, except that my cock and balls were man sized. They had grown big all of a sudden, and on my small frame looked huge, even when soft. It was made even more obvious by my lack of any hair. I had no hair at all on my balls, not around my cock, not on my legs, not under my arms. But the thing that got the most attention from the other boys was my foreskin.

I remember in grade 8 hearing all about the showers at high school, and I dreaded the day I would have to get undressed in front of anyone else and take a shower. All my life I had only used a bath tub at home - all through my early teens I really liked soaking in the tub, getting a hard on and jerking off, watching the smokey, white jism float around on the water and cling to my legs and belly. I remember my mom caught me jerking off once - I was about 15 and had a big boner. She just stared at it, and I tried to tell her I was just cleaning under the skin. She told me if she ever caught me again she would tell my doctor and he would cut the skin off. Funny, but the thought rather excited me - nobody ever talked about the facts of life, or about what was happening to me and my body, or why - all I remember my dad ever doing was giving me a bath when I was about 11, and telling me to pull back the skin and "swish" my dick around in the water to clean it. The thought of having the doctor take a look wasn't a bad feeling!

But the day arrived when I finally went to high school, and I was dreading it. In the first gym class we were all told to bring towels and soap for the showers that we would have to take. I stalled it as long as I could, but soon I was the only one without soap and towels, and the teacher told me that next class I would shower - either I would have a towel to dry off or I wouldn't, but that I would have to strip down and go in the shower.

I awoke the morning of that gym class petrified - I had a big boner, and jerked off as soon as I awoke. I jerked off again before I left for school, and again in the cubicle in the toilet at gym class, hoping that it would stay soft long enough to get through the shower. It didn't. All of the other boys had some hair around their cocks, and all of them were cut. Some of the cocks were tiny, some were long and thin, some were fat and short. A few were like mine, long and fairly thick, but mine was the only one that had a foreskin, and mine was the only one that was hairless. It got as hard as a rock and I couldn't help it. It didn't take long for everyone to notice - my hairless balls, my hairless dick was like a flagpole. I tried to hide it, but before the shower was over, a couple of the guys grabbed me, tossed me on the ground, held my arms and legs down, and proceeded to play with my soft, baby-smooth balls.

I was in agony and in heaven at the same time. Then one of them gently tweaked the end of my foreskin, and pulled it slowly back over my cockhead. None of them had ever seen a foreskin before, and they were all fascinated by it. It was the most incredible feeling I ever had, and it just took pulling the skin back that once for me to shoot my load all over my stomach an d face, and over half of the group standing nearby. My cock stayed hard, and they all hooted and howled. I realized that most of them were hard by this time, and a couple were even jerking off. The teacher came in and helped me up, and gave them all shit.

But try as I might, every gym class after that I was hard again, and in almost every class someone would push me to the ground and pull back my skin to see me shoot. I really hated it, because they all made fun of me and I couldn't stop them. Anyway, one day after a cross country meet, one of the older boys named Peter from another class was in the shower at the same time. He was bigger than me, and didn't have hardly any hair anywhere except a little above his cock and under his arms. His dick was real big, and uncut too. When they started in on me, he stopped them right away.

He got in a fight with a couple of them, naked in the shower, but it was no match as Peter was on the football team. They all left me alone after that, but still taunted me about being hairless and hard when Peter wasn't around. Meanwhile, Peter was real kind to me. When he pulled them off me the first time, I was so glad it was over that I started crying. That made me feel even worse, but he took me in his arms and held me real close, right in the shower.

I was hard as a rock, but his muscles felt so tight and smooth, and he smelled so good, I couldn't control it and I shot a load all over him. I got real embarrassed, but he just laughed and helped me wash off. He was the first one ever to tell me that it was normal to get boners! He asked me to meet him after school, and we went to his house. He was only 16, but he seemed like he knew everything and was such a man compared to me. We spent hours talking, and I felt like I could tell him anything, and he listened without making me feel bad or thinking I was stupid or a suck. I told him all about my problems with my boner and especially my lack of hair. He laughed at that, and said he had been the same way. He got his hair just before he turned 16, and boys used to jerk him off in the shower too, so he knew what it felt like. I felt a lot better after that, and I kept going over to his place after school.

He showed me a lot of things that only an uncut boy could know - how to tie a piece of string around the end of the foreskin to keep if from pulling back, how to pull the skin back real slowly all the way to the base of the cock and to lubricate with soap and slowly twist my hand over the head, and how good it felt to suck on and put your tongue under the skin.

I was almost 16 and I remember the day he found my first cock hair - it was just above my cock, on the right side, and we were so excited. He looked my balls over very carefully and found a couple more underneath them. Even my lower legs had a little down on them. It was an incredible feeling to have someone congratulate me for starting to become a man! It didn't take long for the hair to grow in then. My voice changed too, and I grew about 9" in height that year, until I was bigger than Peter, although in our wrestling matches he could still beat me. We used to wrestle in his garage almost every day, without clothes on. I always got a boner, and he sometimes did and when we were tired out we would lay in each others arms for a while, and when we caught our breath we would slowly jerk each other off. He went off to college that fall, and I was real lonely for a long time. But I was in the shower one day at school when I came across a group of boys holding another kid down and jerking him off. I put a stop to it right away, and the kid, who wasn't more than 14, and hairless and uncut, was so glad he held on to me and started crying. I held him real tight for a while, and suddenly I felt a spurt of hot liquid shoot against my leg...

Gay & City - What's in a Blow Job?

The truth is, I was horny that weekend. I undressed every good-looking passerby on the street with my well-equipped mind’s eye. As the song goes, I was looking for fast love and I needed it fast. On Saturday morning I stopped by at Nick’s for a cup of coffee. While sipping my frothy cappuccino, I was gazing through the window, still keeping an eye on the eligible traffic. “There are many American tourists in town,” said Nick. “Well...” I scanned the street once more, “let’s go and GET some.”

Then there was this guy on Gaydar that I had been warming myself up with. But it wasn’t going anywhere. First, he had a boyfriend. Oh, by the way, don’t you just love it when people on Gaydar say: “Only looking for sex as I’ve already found the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. He’s smart, romantic, sweet, intelligent, endearing, exciting, incredible.” It always makes me wonder! And second, he started one of my least favorite discussions: who’s going to do what in bed. Clinical discussions like this tend to tire me. Besides, it was pointless to argue with me about it. I am the doer of the action. Period.

On Saturday night was the house-warming party of The Godfather that I’d been looking forward to the whole week. The Godfather’s parties were always surprising in an unconventional sort of way. I attended the event with Richard whom I’d dated a couple of times a year ago and then quite abruptly stopped seeing. And the first person I ran into on entering the Godfather’s house was Rolf - a man whom I’d seen twice that month but had lost interest in for unaccountable reasons. So there I was with the embodiments of two discontinued dating adventures. I spent the first twenty minutes of the night maneuvering between the two, trying to make amends, as it were, for my unfaithful dating pattern. (Or is unfaithful dating an oxymoron in itself?!) I produced the most unimaginable civil smiles. I poured them drinks. I paid compliments to their outfits. There was a huge line in front of the toilet. Not an unlikely occurrence for the Godfather’s house. Young and happening gay men who are out there always like to go in there at a certain state of the party and do their thing. As for me, I only wanted to pee.

Behind me in line was Trevor whom I’d shagged once some time ago. When it was finally my turn to enter, he sneaked in with me. “Nothing that I haven’t seen before,” he beamed at me disarmingly. Whatever, I thought. He probably wanted to take his drugs, while I was peeing, which was perfectly fine with me. The bathroom itself looked like a mini crystal palace. There was glass everywhere – on the walls and the ceiling.

I was doing my best to pee but wasn’t succeeding as I was aware of Trevor’s presence. He was strolling around, carelessly observing the nail files and shampoos perched at the head of the bathtub. What was he doing in there anyway, I started to wonder.
“I can’t pee,” I said.

“That’s because I am here,” was Trevor’s answer and before I knew it, a divine veil of warmth surrounded my dick: his hungry accommodating mouth. Mischievous sparkles were dancing in his eyes, while his hands were pulling my Calvin Kleins further down. I was loving it! The sheer naughtiness of the situation, the stolen moment of pleasure, the people waiting in line behind the door. It was one masterpiece of a blowjob performed with the intuitive skill of two partners in crime. The kaleidoscopic reflection in the mirrors of him kneeling down, sucking me was turning me on by the second. In fact me and my ego were getting considerably turned on. We indulged in a few more quick activities and the mirrors on the walls flashed them back at us in a vodka-blurred slide-show. On leaving the bathroom, the people in line looked questioningly and smirked. “I thought you weren’t doing drugs anymore.” “Only on special occasions,” was my well-rehearsed answer. After this unexpected culmination the embodiments of my two discontinued dating adventures left as if by way of arrangement. The party was slowly coming to an end. Yet I was still horny! Didn’t feel like clinging to my partner in crime from the bathroom as I knew I should leave things where they were.

Don’t force it, just savor the exciting fellatial memory, I was instructing myself. Looks good on paper, but how do you stick to it, being a horny young gay man?! “Don’t force it, don’t force it,” I was repeating to myself, while... cycling to The Cockring.
I entered, saw and left, all within a time span of five minutes. Apparently, I had been granted my culmination of the evening and had to treasure it.

On leaving the Cockring, a Spanish tourist turned at me and said: “Oh, you look gorgeous!” I smiled. Then he paused, gave me a piercing look and continued: “Actually, I wasn’t honest. You look fucking gorgeous!”.
I smiled again timidly. How did I deserve this second treat?! And then I knew. To be granted a blowjob when you least expect it is magic. And this magic was still working on me.


by borissov, in Nightlife & Reports

The Global View Of Gay Marriage

Three years after Amsterdam's mayor officiated at the Netherlands' first gay wedding, the gay marriage rate is falling, the first divorces are being registered and the issue has disappeared from the political agenda.

While the United States is engaged in debate on a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage, Canadians are discussing a federal law to legalize it and many European countries are adopting civil unions for gay couples.

But in the Netherlands, nobody talks about the issue anymore.

"It's really become less of something that you need to explain," says Anne-Marie Thus, who in 2001 married Helene Faasen. "We're totally ordinary. We take our children to preschool every day. People know they don't have to be afraid of us."

Around the world, countries are coming to terms with how to treat homosexual couples - and the trend in many is toward liberalizing laws.

In Denmark, civil unions with the same rights as marriage have been around since 1989, and other Nordic countries followed suit in the 1990s.

The Dutch were the first to eliminate any distinction between gay and straight, striking all references to gender in the marriage laws. Belgium soon did the same.

Canada jumped to the forefront of gay rights in North America in June when it announced plans to legalize same-sex marriages. Many same-sex couples streamed north to marry in Ottawa and British Columbia after courts in those provinces authorized weddings.

In most of Africa, homosexuality is illegal and gay marriage unthinkable. But in South Africa, gay rights were enshrined in the post-apartheid constitution and some groups are lobbying for the right to marry.

In Japan, homosexuality is no longer considered a mental illness, but many gays still feel pressure to go through a sham heterosexual marriage. Japan is more progressive than most of Asia.

Strongly Roman Catholic countries such as Spain and Italy refuse to recognize gay couples, following the Vatican's abhorrence of homosexuality. But there are important exceptions.

In Portugal, and in Spain's Navarra and Basque regions, gay couples who live together long enough receive the same benefits as heterosexuals under common law unions. In Argentina's capital, Buenos Aires, gay couples can register for a civil union.

France and Germany have civil union laws, and Britain is in the process of adopting them.

The Dutch have watched the hoopla in the United States with some bemusement. Amsterdam Mayor Job Cohen, who married six couples at the stroke of midnight on April 1, 2001, when the Dutch law took effect, sent a note of support to Gavin Newsom, the San Francisco mayor who set off a rush to California when he officiated same-sex ceremonies.

In contrast to Amsterdam's boisterous gay clubs and the spring rite of the Gay Pride parade through its famed canals, Faasen and Thus, the Dutch lesbian couple, live a quiet middle-class life in a neat apartment on the city's outskirts. They hardly seem like revolutionaries, or even trendsetters.

Faasen is a notary and Thus works part time in a home for the elderly. The couple have a 3½-year-old son, Nathan, and 2-year-old daughter, Myrthle. Faasen adopted the two, who are Thus' biological children.

Their reasons for marrying were prosaic.

"With marriage, you have a whole range of legal issues settled right in one go," Faasen says, scooping up Myrthle. "Child care, life insurance, health insurance, pension, inheritance. Otherwise you're left taking care of those things bit by bit, where it's possible."

In typical Dutch fashion, the marriage law was debated for years before it was finally enacted without fanfare. Government statistics show 2,400 same-sex marriages took place in its first nine months, compared with 1,500 last year.

Marten van Mourik, a law professor at the Catholic University of Nijmegen, says the declining rate of same-sex unions vindicated his opposition to the change in the law and shows it was unnecessary since civil unions were already legal.

"You don't change an institution with such a long history from one day to the next just to satisfy the whim of one group of people," he says. "Marriage is a relationship between a man and a woman intended to produce children. You can't get around that."

But he concedes there is no political support for reversing the law, even though the government is now led by the Christian Democrats, which had opposed the legislation.

Henk Krol, editor of the magazine Gay Krant, argues civil unions are an intermediate stage on the way to full marriage rights for gays, which he says are inevitable.

"A civil union is a second-rate marriage," he says. "People want a honeymoon. Not a trip to celebrate a registered partnership."

He says those who oppose gay marriage for religious reasons often soften their thinking when they realize they won't be forced to accept gay couples joining their church.

"It's an issue of separation of church and state," he says. "We don't have gay marriage here. We have civil marriage, and it's the same for everyone."

But Thus, who was raised Catholic, said the fact of her marriage itself has helped win over religious people.

"Especially for religious people, marriage makes a statement that 'this is someone I love and will grow old with'," she said.

"When you're just 'partners' or 'living together' they think ... you know, every day a new lover'. With marriage, the commitment is real, and they believe it."

By Toby Sterling

Homo Superior: The Unofficial Underground Bank of Prague

Except that, you know, banks make money off what they loan.

[I originally thought better of posting this earlier in the day; however, when Valentýn came home from work and reported that Bryan was, once again, sitting in Monty's swilling beer, or vodka, as he prefers, I changed my mind. Subsequent additions are in green.]

Me, I have to budget for what the boys in my flat, and my flatmates, inevitably ask me for during the week.

It's a stupid policy and the result is that by the time Monday rolls around, I'm down to my last few hundred crowns, while Vasile is roaming Prague on someone else's tab, and Bryan buys a couple beers a day at Monty's for both him and the Ugly, but Actually Quite Pleasant and Quiet, Boy who lives with him in his room.

A week ago last Friday I loaned Homer 500 Kč; two hours later he borrowed another 400. An hour or so later I knocked on his door to find a roomful of boys, two of whom I'd never seen before, all happily eating, apparently on my dime. I almost forgot: Also in attendance was Sonja, the homeless transvestite drug dealer whom I allowed, once, to shower and wash her clothes in my flat. I told Bryan, OK, but don't make a habit of it. Meaning, by anyone's reasonable assumptions, just this once. Does anyone doubt that? Having read this blog, even cursorily? Instead, I see her every week, which, without even having to consult dictionary.com, does constitute a habit.

As Bryan said, I blew a gasket. Not initially for the reason he assumed - that here was yet another group of drug buddies I had to learn to deal with, coming and going at all hours of the night, chattering at piko-enhanced volumes, keeping Valentýn awake - but because Bryan has taken the opportunity I'd presented - that is, emptying my side of the flat of boys so I could have some peace and quiet to work - to fill his side of the flat with the boys of his choice. Do you see a pattern emerging? I do. I'm not gone one day and Bryan managed to kick out or alienate both of my boys, one of whom I'm in love with. Wielding his authority, which, I might add, derives ultimately from me, seems to be one of his favorite ways of acting out. I'm still plenty angry, at everyone involved, for what happened.

I did quickly assume that yes, here was another pervitin orgy for Bryan to write about in excruciating, convoluted and utterly self-indulgent, not to mention indiscreet, detail on his blog. I was wrong about that, but only in the timing of my accusation - money I loaned was spent on piko that day - but given his history, I can't say that it was an unreasonable conclusion to jump to. I only want him to keep the number of boys in his room down to two, which, I think is reasonable. He refused.

About Bryan, I was once teased: "When is he going to start writing your blog for you?" I'd never given much credence to the people who have suggested that Homer was vying, probably unconsciously, for my position in the flat, in the blogging world. How absurd, I thought. I'm not so sure anymore. He'd already confessed to me early on that he was jealous of my relationships with my boys. He wanted some of the action. Fine, go to it. Get your own boys but don't expect mine to fall in love with you just because you're my friend and live in the next room.

While you're at it, Bryan, finance them with your own money as well. And before you go boozing it up, pay back what you owe. Even better yet, live within your means.

I contacted Bryan last night, after looking at my wallet and calculating what I'd need to feed Valentýn and me for the next couple days, and texted that I'd appreciate the 900 Kč. Bryan responded that he expected an apology, insinuating, while at the same time denying, that he wouldn't pay me back until I did. It's the following day, and I still still don't have my money.

[I just texted him again, asking if it was possible for him to pay back at least something. No response.]

(Full disclosure: Besides yelling and blowing a gasket, I also kicked his door, shattering a piece of it, immediately after he told me that he was going to do what he liked, with whom he liked, that I was not his landlord - which would tell you quite a bit about Bryan's ambitions if you knew the specifics of my financial situation - and that if I tried to interfere with whom he had in the flat, he would call the police. He also attempted to goad me into hitting him, which I hadn't considered until he mentioned it, which is the purpose of goading, after all, and oh so classy; baldly stated that the episode of the Blackmailing Serbian Asshole was my fault because Normal was my boy first; complained that he, Bryan, was tired of being awakened at all hours [normal working hours for the rest of us] because Valentýn made coffee every morning before he went to work; and, oh goddess, I'm sure there was more because, as anyone who has read his blog knows, Bryan is never at a loss for words, often of elaborate self-justification and self-defense.)

I have plenty to apologize for, obviously; but, he wants a sincere one. It's just not in me at the moment. We are not compatible flatmates and I want him to leave.

There. Since Bryan's so keen on telling other bloggers how to write, I've managed to make my point without writing a novel and without bringing in a million or-so non-salient points. Please, make a rebuttal, but take some advice from me: Unless you're willing to admit that not every word that sludges out of your fingers is precious, and I have serious doubts about your ability to make that simple, but essential, correction, no one's going to be able to make it to the end of your post.


source:http://homo-superior.blogspot.com/

Israel politicians decry gay tourism ads

JERUSALEM -- Some Israeli politicians have sharply criticized a campaign aimed at promoting gay and lesbian tourism in Jerusalem.

The "Pink Jerusalem" campaign, which features photographs of gay and lesbian couples at tourist attractions and historic sites in the city, was created by the Association for Civil Rights in Israel and the Homosexuals and Lesbians organization together with the country's tourism ministry, Ynetnews reported Tuesday.

"I unequivocally reject the attempt to focus a state-sponsored campaign on a delusional minority that suffers from a normative defect," Deputy Prime Minister Eli Yishai said. "Jerusalem and Amsterdam are the same for these people. Therefore, those who fail to recognize Jerusalem's holiness had better stay away from it."

Tourism minister Yitzhak Aharonovitch said that the campaign was designed by his predecessor, Abraham Hirchson. He said that he did not agree with the decision.

Binyamin Elon, a member of Knesset from the National Union party, said that Aharonovitch told him that the photos were published without his knowledge and that his office has been instructed not to continue the campaign.

May 30, 2007
source:http://www.metimes.com/storyview.php?StoryID=20070530-030640-1921r

Gay Italy-Rome 2007

Gay Italy-Rome 2007

Gay Italy today is a story of contrasts--between a conservative south and the progressive driving north, between an entrenched Catholic church and modern gay life, between traditional heterosexual marriage and demands for civil unions (DiCo's), between religiously molded parliament members and their secularist opponents. The turmoil and passion behind all sides is seen by most as 'life as usual' in this most historic and artistic country.

Also see:
Gay Italy News & Reports 2000-05
Gay Italy News & Reports 2006
Gay Sicily 2002 story
Gay Sicily 2007 story
Italy Photo Gallery

There is no sign outside Arcigay’s Rome offices. It is symbolic of Italy’s attitude toward homosexual people. Outwardly there is absence, ignorance, denial and refusal to openly accept the reality of a LGBT community in Italian society. But inside the Arcigay office there is a bright, cheerful, energized organization driving into the future. Gay folks here are forging ahead despite much resistance from conservative politicians and endless rejections from the Vatican hierarchy.

Even a brief knowledge of the church’s stance on this ‘inherent moral evil’, as the late pope put it, is cause for simultaneous anger and pity from gay people. Anger at the church’s ignorance about human nature and pity that it has become lost in its own theology that it cannot think in more modern terms. Said one activist, "they wear antiquated clothing, repeat ancient rituals and are cornered by their own materialistic traditions; the church hierarchy cannot confess their blindness about homosexuality."

But such policies are slowly but surely loosing their grasp. Catholic Spain told the Vatican to butt out of politics when the Spanish government voted to allow gay marriage in 2006. Now in 2007, the Italian governing party teeters on the edge of approving gay civil unions.


(1) Arcigay and LGBT Organizations
Operating despite much opposition, Franco Grillini started Arcigay in 1985 when both the church and state stone-walled emerging public homosexual expression. Grillini is now a member of the Italian parliament and gay unions (DiCo) are closer to reality; it’s obvious who is going to win this war, but not without political and social bloodshed.

Carlo Guarini invited me in to see Arcigay’s beehive of activity energized by more than 100 volunteers (at different times). His partner is Roberto Stocco whose handsome face appears large and bold on the oversized posters around town advertising the DiCo rally in March 2007.

DiCo unions are similar to the French PACS but with fewer rights. Called DiCo’s, for dirriti conviviento (‘Di co’ also means ‘I say’ in Italian), the road to passage of the legislation was derailed by a recent vote of no confidence (on a foreign policy issue) in the current prime minister's (Romano Prodi) government. But the congress quickly realized they had shot themselves in the foot with that vote and voted again (out of fear of conservative Berlusconi returning) to keep Prodi, but now weakened in his support for DiCo’s.

Fabritio Marratto is the current (volunteer) president of Arcigay Rome. Operating on a slim budget derived mostly from private donations and a bit of government funding for HIV/AIDS education, Arcigay has no paid staff. Funding also comes from membership card purchases (for discounts at gay venues).

Carlo and volunteers Nino and Francesco explained some of the Arcigay programs and activities such as counseling, legal advice, lobbying and social activities. One of the newer services is the phone Helpline set up last year. Nino was on duty the day I visited and fielded calls as the four us talked about gay life in Rome.

Where is love found? How safe is it to be out? What do parents think? How do you make friends? What about gay youth and lesbians? What’s the political agenda? What's the future for DiCo's?

Regarding the women, there is Arcilesbica in Italy which is a co-equal and independent organization with similar and different agendas (see below).

Nino said there was a training program to educate phone volunteers how to respond to callers and to deal with their questions, fears and issues. He also commented that some women call in but hang up when they hear a man’s voice. Others, mostly men, are afraid and hang up once or twice before they have the courage to actually talk.

Nino is a professional stage dancer and had a primary relationship that lasted a couple of years. Now single again he lives a busy and satisfying life in Rome without accessing the bars or clubs. Friendships are the mainstay of social life for him. But he is not out to his parents who live in Naples, two hours south of Rome, which is even more conservative than Rome. He is, not surprisingly, apprehensive about their reactions and does not want to hurt them “because they don’t understand about homosexuality.” And he does not feel he as to be out to everyone or show his sexuality in public. “I live quietly and am happy with myself. If I have another boyfriend it will by accident, not by searching.”

Carlo, 23, came out to his parents at 16. They were not apparently upset and have been welcoming to his partner Roberto (photo left), as have Roberto’s parents toward Carlo. Roberto is in communications and has appeared on a gay TV program.

Francesco is the volunteer secretary/coordinator of Arcigay Rome who is busy with such issues as memberships. He and his partner of two years met in a chat room online.

But this was not the best moment to visit Arcigay, two days before a major public demonstration. Volunteers were bustling about with meetings, coordinating committee activity, getting posters up, arranging speakers, equipment and the Arcigay information booth at the rally (see below).

The Scene
For a major world city of nearly 4 million (including the surrounding province) Rome has a modest number of LGBT venues and organizations despite and because of its general homophobia. Rome is where heterosexual marriage and children-making are unquestionable pillars of the standard social structure. And although fewer and fewer Roman citizens regularly attend the countless churches in town (many cracked and closed), the emotional and political weight of centuries of Catholic rituals and dogma are inescapable.

(It can easily be said that the church built Rome. Virtually every piazza has at least one gothic, baroque, neoclassical, renaissance or 19th century towering edifice and steeple overlooking the bustling life below as a reminder as to who is ‘lord’. It also provides many soup kitchens for the poor.)

According to the gay entertainment magazine 'Divo' there are about fifteen bars/discos, five saunas, two sex shops, about 25 LGBT associations, three pro-gay hotels, a swanky Eduardo II restaurant (prix fixe about $50) and a number of private sex clubs that provide total anonymity among mostly gay and bisexual strangers whose sexual truth is securely hidden behind closed doors and in the closet.

(2) Roman Lesbians
In contrast to mythological and powerful women such as Athena, Aphrodite and Diana who could determine the fate and flow of men, today’s lesbian women do not feel as empowered. Indeed they feel intimidated and cowed by the omnipresence of that male bastion of opinion and dogma known as the Vatican.

During a visit to the Arcilesbica office in suburban Rome (in the St Maria del Soccorso district; Metro stop Pietralata), among working class cement-and-brick apartments blocks, I was advised not to underestimate the power of institutionalized religion in Rome and Italy.

“Nowhere else in the western world can you find such a deep and strenuous arm of religion injected into politics and government as you see in Rome,” said Rosarita, a stylish and articulate member of Arcilesbica Rome. “The separation of church and state in 1929 was only a piece of paper. The reality is interference and influence. Lesbians have no place of power in politics or respect from the church because of the pope’s attitude—and this one is worse than the last,” referring to the current German-born pope who is often rumored to have a homosexual history: “that’s why he is so much against us.”

Indeed, in the media coverage after the rally more than one newspaper scolded speakers and spectators for being disrespectful toward the Vatican and for mocking it. Some demonstrators wore paper tiaras with the words ‘No Vat’ as a protest against papal intervention into civil and political issues. In this ‘holy city’ the privilege of the church is such that few openly criticize it or openly condemn its homophobic policies of discrimination. Those who do take the church to task are invariably disparaged by mainstream opinion. (In my hotel room three out of the four pictures and etchings on the walls were of churchy subjects.)

Arcilesbica is the independent sister organization of the gay male Arcigay--little sister, since there are only about fifty card-carrying members (with additional support and attendance for special events) compared to the thousand-plus members of Arcigay. Two other women members Claudia and Vera assured me that the two organizations work easily together when necessary such as for the March 10, 2007 demonstration (see below) supporting DiCo legislation. At the various gay venues across the city, Vera said, men and women mix easily and only a small number of women are separatists.

Arcilesbica carries on political activism, offers a phone help line one evening a week, and, most importantly, offers social and emotional support to members or anyone wanting it. The evening I visited about twenty women gathered for the popular semi-monthly discussion/support group facilitated by a psychologist. Topics such as fear, rage, coming out and dating are discussed.

Many women fear coming out in such a heavily heterosexual society where family—marriage and kids--is fundamental to the traditional Italian way of life. Even lesbians who may be out to their own inner circle of friends will not want to converse or contact other lesbians in public or at social functions.

Vera felt that about 70% of lesbian women have primary live-in relationships—usually hushed behind closed doors. In Rome and other major Italian cities two women sharing a flat as ‘friends’ is common. But they will only say they are flat mates if anyone outside their inner circle asks. Claudia thought women seek monogamous relationships more naturally than men, who are “more adventurous and wandering.”

These words of insight were all the more valuable because only one of these helpful women—Rosarita--was easily articulate in English. Despite the European Union and its touted unification themes, the vast majority of Italians in Rome do not speak English (not that they should). So the generous efforts of Vera and Claudia were much appreciated.

Lunch with Rosarita
The following day Rosarita Costa talked further at lunch (at restaurant Settinio all’Arancio, via dell’Arancio, 50/52, Roma) near the elegant Spanish Steps and the Keats-Shelley-Byron museum.

Rosarita is a fashionable career woman in her fifties who has lived in Europe, America and Mexico during her professional life. She is out to anyone who cares to know at work and is comfortable with her family who have mixed reactions; she does not hide her lesbian aspect from anyone. At her workplace—an international legal firm--there is a liberal and tolerant policy of inclusion so there is no need to mask or falsify her truth. Mostly people in her office don’t care to know who is gay or lesbian but if they know they don’t really care about the differences. The partners and staff have their own lives to attend to and have no time or intention to act against someone’s personal lifestyle. Rome is too big and life is too short to bother much about such things said Rosarita.

So she feels ‘safe’ and goes about her managerial work with no interference other than the usual frictions between different personalities working closely. Her lesbian activity is focused outside work, at Arcilesbica, where she recently became a member after returning to Rome four years ago. “When I was younger, living in London and Paris, I was a lesbian activist in the cause of equal rights and purging the stigma attached to homosexuality; in the seventies and eighties it was a time of change, uneven change, in Europe and America. Afterwards I eased out of frontline pro-gay work and for years I was okay with being supportive of the younger generation taking charge and creating organizations and lobbying government for further change.

“But when I came here to work in Rome, it was like stepping backing time for LGBT people. Yes, there were associations and activists but I felt there was much more work to do to oppose the oppression coming from the Church. I have never seen such direct, vocal and determined discrimination. I was shocked so now I’m back in the ring having joined Arcilesbica to continue to struggle.”

What Rosarita also finds disappointing is the degree of “indifference and arrogance” of heterosexual Romans toward this discrimination. “They don’t see the injustice. They have what they want and don’t care about others…their arrogance infuriates me.” She also felt this self-satisfaction extends among many lesbian couples who protect their identities in comfortable closets and will not risk public view or won't join Arcilesbica.

As for the current hot topic of domestic partnership unions (DiCo's) Rosarita has much to feel disappointed about. “This bill is too small and too fuzzy and insufficient. It offers us almost nothing that is close to hetero marriage rights.”

The point that aggravates her most is the excessively long waiting period before some of the partnership benefits kick in. To receive inheritance rights a LGBT couple (or co-habitating straight couple) have to prove they have lived together for nine years. The same right is granted to a hetero married couple the moment after they say ‘I do’. In order to keep a rental agreement or secure pension-survivor rights after the death of a partner the ‘widow’ has to prove they have lived together for at least three years.

Further, in Italy a partner--gay or straight—cannot legally will his estate to an unmarried significant other. After a death, any blood relative can come in and take all or part of the estate as ‘family’ and usurp a long-term partner.

"DiCo's don’t really offer that much to a partnerships; they offer individual rights, really, not partnership rights,” added Alessandro from Arcigay the next day.

A Chat with Julia
Julia Pietrangeli is an articulate 36 year-old Rome-based board member of the national organization of Arcigay and Arcilesbica, which is headquartered in Bologna. As a professional she works for IBM, known for it liberal attitude toward lesbigay employees.

Similar to Rosarita, a major lament for Julia, as a highly active gay rights advocate, is the overwhelming presence and stultifying oppression of the Catholic Church. ”It has such vast influence--spiritually, financially, institutionally and politically and in the workplace. It owns half of Rome in its huge real estate portfolios—hotels, apartment blocks, commercial businesses; and they don’t pay taxes!,” she declared in an indignant voice.

And because the church bureaucracy is so entrenched inside Rome and the Vatican they are little challenged to change their rigid patriarchal attitudes by secular forces. They exert a serious pressure on the parliament through their intense lobbying--personally, privately and from the pulpit. “They are an old culture, an old mindset…so far behind Spain that has give gays the right to marry.”

Julia said there are really very few liberal or independent-minded members of parliament today. (The Italian Liberal party is actually far right and anti-gay.) At the March 10 pro-DiCo three MP's bravely attended and spoke which resulted in their being criticized by Prime Minister Prodi and the media for supporting the ‘pope-bashing’ event.

Julia thought it was the highest level of hypocrisy that many MP's live with unmarried partners—or have secret extra-marital affairs--yet reject the DiCo legislation, which covers straight as well as LGB couples.

Currently in the parliament there is one openly gay, one openly lesbian and one transsexual member (Vladimir Divinia, photo above right with clock around her neck to remind people of the theme 'time is running out--DiCo's now!').

As an out and visible lesbian activist, Julia was pleased to see that the younger generation of lesbians appeared less afraid than in the past. She sees more courage and daring among young people (16-25) and is glad that lesbian separatists have not had much influence with the young women as they mix often and easily with the young men.

“I think this is a changing point in our history now. It’s the beginning of the end of the stranglehold of the church. Also helping the change is the fact that homosexuality in Italy was never criminalized because native gays were not thought to exist to any serous degree (although the fascists actively persecuted them in the 1930s and early 1940s).

This has had a paradoxical effect in recent decades: LGBT people have not been arrested or attacked yet by the same token there has not developed an active culture of rebellion against the covert and overt repression of the church, the mafia and the government. “The enemy was for a long time invisible and did not galvanize a gay-rights surge. Even today most people—gay or not—cannot see the hidden forces that govern ‘democratic’ Italy…corporate villains,” Julia lamented.

Finishing her impassioned conversation, Julia described Arcilesbica/Arcigay as a proud inclusive civil rights achievement. The national organization has offices in 22 cities across Italy with national meetings four times a year at the head office in Bologna. “Each year we have become stronger and more open, pushing for heightened political and social consciousness and urging more personal responsibility to resist both visible and invisible enemies…Arcilesbica is now a permanent reference point for gay women; we are here to stay and to empower their lives.”

(Two other local Roman LGBT organizations are Mario Mieli association and the DG Project (Dee Gay Project), which are mixed gay and lesbian social groups not primarily involved in activism but still participate in the rallies.

(3) DICO Demonstration Rally
In a colorful and vocal protest against the threat that Prodi’s weak and realigned coalition might scuttle the DiCo bill, a large rally of about 10,000 DiCo supporters was held under an overcast but friendly sky on Saturday March 10, 2007 in Piazza Farnese.

The action was a strong-willed reminder that DiCo rights will not be silenced and will not go away. One after another, about a dozen notable and passionate speakers told the crowd—and a larger TV audience—that DiCo rights, gay rights, non-marital rights are human rights granted to all Italians regardless of gender or sexual orientation.

Flailing at the hypocrisy of Italian political leaders whose own marital lives have been scandalous, Arcigay founder and current member of parliament Franco Grillini (left) took to task the clichéd ‘family values’ defense often used against non-straight, non-married couples: ‘Heterosexual leaders of this country do more to damage and threaten the institution of marriage. We are looking to form loving relationships not shame and violate them like our illustrious government leaders.”

Current Arcigay national president Sergio Lo Guidice from Bologna was vehement in his demand that every Italian citizen be treated with equal respect without exception.

Arcigay Rome president reminded the thousands that “we are in new territory now; never have LGBT people been so present and public and self-assured to demand recognition of our relationships in a legal form. This is where we should be and it’s time now for the government to wake up and realize this is a new age, not the dark ages of blind ignorance. Gay people have always been part of the Italian culture and gay people have created some of the greatest art and architecture of our beloved country. We are alive now and have been alive for a thousand years. We are moving ahead and want our live and loves to be seen and named and legalized.”

The idea of ‘time running out’ was the major theme for the rally. Posters all over the city displayed male and female couples holding a clock underlined with the words ‘Time is running out—DiCo's now.’

Emphasizing the point, Italy’s first-ever transsexual member of parliament, Vladimir Divinia in a bright red dress and flowing long black hair, wore an old-fashioned alarm clock around her neck as a highly visible reminder to all present—and for the evening news—that all Italians may be different but we all deserve the same rights and respect. Vladimir’s presence was highly applauded by the supportive audience who have followed her controversial career into and within politics upsetting the status quo and heterosexist presumptions about human sexuality.

Arcilesbica was very present in the form of countless lesbians in the audience and several speakers on stage. National Arcilesbica president (left) spoke in no-nonsense terms about the rights of lesbians—and indeed all women—to be fully equal in every aspect of Italian life including heterosexual marriage and heterosexual co-habitation as well as same-sex relationships.

As a reminder of the possibility and reality of same-sex relationships, a large banner was strung across the face of one of the many renaissance buildings in the Piazza Farnese; against a white background in bold red and black letters were the words ‘lo DiCo Zapatero!’ (‘say it like Zapatero’) a clear reference to the Spanish prime minister who advanced gay marriage in Spain last year.

A Struggle for the Future
Some of the greatest opponents of DiCo's are the men in the Catholic church across town in Vatican City. One estimate is that there are about 900 churches in Rome. The grandest of which of course is St.Peter’s Basilica where from on ‘high’ the Catholic church issues a constant stream of anti-gay opinions including anti-DiCo claims that they will undermine the family unit. (Apparently the clerics have not visited Spain lately to determine the alleged sabotage of heterosexual marriage in the past year.)

Despite the official separation of church and state in 1929 (the Vatican does not get a direct vote in the Italian parliament) there are plenty of members willing to do its bidding.) Committed opponents of DiCo's have declared war on the legislation. Ordinarily their votes might be in the minority but given the recent fragmentation among the ruling coalition the DiCo bill has been moved further back on the agenda of the re-aligned coalition. Not unlike many democracies, in-fighting and party politics appear to come before human rights.

The rally was given coverage on the evening news and on the following day five major newspapers reported the rally on their front pages. Not surprisingly, L’Osservatore Romano, the Vatican newspaper, carried no coverage of the rally, preferring instead to print oversize pages about church history and the impending sainthood of the late pope John Paul II (who called homosexuals "inherently immoral"). See Reuters report on the demonstration.

By Richard Ammon
GlobalGayz.com
April 2007

Gay Amsterdam

Amsterdam has rather a large gay scene. Many foreigners find themselves attracted to the city, and you can also spot celebrities. Amsterdam has more than one hundred gay bars, discos, saunas, video stores, bookshops, restaurants and hotels.

Pink Point
Gay and lesbian information and souvenir kiosk situated at the Homomonument, Westermarkt (on the Keizersgracht). Friendly and helpful volunteers will answer all your questions about gay Amsterdam. As well the best selection of gay gifts in Holland. Open daily 12.00 till 6 PM.
www.pinkpoint.org

Gay monument
In 1987, the one and only gay monument in the world has been opened in Amsterdam, close to the Westerkerk and Anne Frank House. The monument is a symbol against discrimination.

Gay night life
There are a few main gay night-life areas in the city: around the square of Rembrandtplein: throught all Reguliersdwarsstraat, via Halvemaansteeg, and along Amstel. Then Warmoesstraat, which is a parallel street to Damrak, next to the Red Light District. Here you will find also many leather bars and rainbow-flagged saunas. For a great selection of gay venues see PiP’s web site: www.underwateramsterdam.com

Gay hotels in Amsterdam

Gay Hotel Orfeo Amsterdam *
Orfeo is Amsterdam's largest exclusively-gay hotel, established in 1969. Located in the center of the city, it is situated within a walk to the Leidseplein, the Kerkstraat gay scene, the Reguliersdwarsstraat gay scene, and Vondelpark.

Gay Hotel the Golden Bear *
Proclaim itself Amsterdam's first exclusively gay-hotel since 1948. The hotel is located in Kerkstraat near Leidseplein, housed in two historic buildings dating from 1737.

ITC Hotel Amsterdam
A beautiful hotel housed in an monumental canal house offers charming accomodations with a canal view.
Address: Prinsengracht 1051, Amsterdam, tel.: + 31 20 6 230 230

Gay accommodation in Amsterdam

Gay friendly bed and breakfasts and apartments
A selection of gay owned and gay friendly B&B's and apartments, each with its own character and charm.
www.find-an-amsterdam-bed-and-breakfast.nl

Avvie - More Amsterdam B&B's
The worldwide bed and breakfast directory listing independent B&B's.

Features a special selection for Amsterdam.

http://bed-and-breakfast.avvie.eu

Cockring
Address: Warmoestraat 96, right behind the Dam.
www.clubcockring.com

Queen’s Head
Address: Zeedijk 20, is about 5 minutes walking from the Centraal Station
www.queenshead.nl

Exit
Address: Reguliersdwaardstraat 42, zwischen Rembrandtplein und Koningsplein
www.april-exit.com

Arc
Cocktail-Hour every day between 17 and 19pm, all cocktails for 5 Euros.
Address: Reguliersdwaardstraat 44, between Rembrandtplein and Koningsplein
www.bararc.com

Lesbian bars/clubs

• Vivelavie, Amstelstraat 7
  This cosy bar is home to a noisy, quite forward audience of lesbians in their 30s. With a 'gezelig' (cosy) atmosphere, with a party on Friday and Saturday night.
  www.vivelavie.net
• Getto, Warmoesstraat 51
• Saarein, Elandstraat 119
• Sapho, Vijzelstraat 103
• You II, Amstel 178

Gay bars

• Amstel Tavern, Amstel 54
• April, Reguliersdwarsstraat 37
• Montmartre, Halvemaansteeg 17
• Reality, Reguliersdwarsstraat 129
• Soho, Reguliersdwarsstraat

Gay clubs

• COC, Rozenstraat 4
• iT, Amstelstraat
• De Trut, Bilderdijkstraat 165

Adult Slang Words

CORRECT TERMS	COLLECTION OF SLANG SYNONYMS
Sexual Intercourse, Penetration, Coitus, Sex, Making Love	f*ck, hump, screw, do it, score, jump bones, knock boots, home run, drill, drill for oil, throw the dagger, bone, get some, get down, rock, ball, ride, rut, shag, bonk, boink, boof, makin' bacon, press bellies, bump uglies, horizontal hokey pokey, stir the macaroni, puttin' on the ritz, nooner (if at mid-day), hide the salami, ride the baloney pony, dork, rail, hit-in, park the beef bus in tuna town, do the hippidy dippidy, horizontal mambo,
Anal Sex, Sodomy, Sodomize	go in the back door, salad toss, butt slam, ride the hershey highway, butt darts, penetrate the poop chute, rimming, anal-ize, anal intruder, mud your turtle, poo stab, corn hole, fudge pack, bum stuff, arse stab, anal invasion, shoveling mud, enter the exit-door, take the dirt road, stuffed butt,
Anus, Rectum, Sphincter	pooper, dirty penny, balloon knot, rose bud, brown-eye, terd cutter, mangina, fudge factory, bung hole, deuce hole, (_!_), rusty bullet hole,
Analingus	suck ass, brown nosing, till the soil, annalingus, tossing salad,
Oral Sex	go down, oralgamie, oralize, licker, give brain, suck the ice cream, go downtown, feed the calf,
Oral Sex Fellatio (usually to a male)	blow job, give head, play the skin flute, hum job, hummer, smoke the pole, eat cheese, talk on the bonophone, speak into the flesh-microphone, bop,
Oral Sex Cunnilingus (usually to a female)	eat her out, muff diving, carpet munch, eat at the Y, eat carpet, have a dog ear sandwich, chewin', rug munch, feed the calf, lapping the little man in the canoe, tip the velvet, yodeling in the canyon of love, lap up the broccoli juice, lap the breadbasket,
Losing Virginity	pop the cherry, lost "it", finally laid one, finally boned one, turn in the V card, become a man, become a woman,
To Masturbate (Female)	rub the clit, fingering, jilling, jilling off, caress the clit, vibrate the vag, slip 'n' slide, soap it up, click the mouse, pet the kitty, stroke the cat, powder your nose, tickle your fancy, self-service, declare your independence, stroke it, stroke, finger-bang, riding the pillow, flick the bristles, flying automatic (with vibrator), dialing the pink telephone, stroke the kitty, polishing the pearl,
To Masturbate (Male)	jerk off, jack off, wank, wank off, beat off, wack off, whack off, beat the meat, stroke it, stroke, stroke off, stroke the salami, choke the chicken, grease the axle, wax the dolphin, choke the bishop, wax the rod, peel the banana, butter the lobster, change gears, walk the dog, polish the knob, onanism, spank the monkey, chase the weasel, whistle dixie, dick off, rub one out, whip the birdie, self-service, squeeze one off, sling jelly, bop the baloney, jack the beanstalk, dunk your dolphin, grease the sprocket, flog the log, punch the clown, squirt around, polish the low-quarters (military), captain jack (personified), pocket pool (through the clothing), play the upright organ, squeeze the lotion dispenser, bleed the serpent, pull the peter, plug the mellon, polish the purple helmet, tickling the turkey, polish the wand, flog the dolphin,
Semen, Ejaculatory Fluid	cum, load, jizz, penis butter, man chowder, nut, boy fluid, spooge, 10cc, lovin' spoon full, man sugar, manthrax, protein smoothie, baby batter, yogurt, cum pop, jizzles, jizz-o-frizz, penis pudding, man mayonaise, population paste, man gravy, milk of mankind, liquid kids, love paste, man juice, dong water, man seed, man-naise, pweack, children seeds, dork wax, peckeroo paste, penial seasoning, grime, spag, spaj, diet jelly, breast icing, creamy mouthwash, creamy cough syrup, face cream, jism, spunk,
Orgasm, Climax, Ejaculate (Male)	cum, get off, shoot a load, blow a load, squirt, spray, shoot, bust a nut, get your nut, get you nut off, explode, release the hostages, splooge, spunk, the big "O",
Orgasm, Climax, (Female)	get off, cum, the big "O",
Perineum (Area between the Anus and the Genital)	garundel, grundal, taint, ass-neck, notcher (male), twernt (female), chode, gootch, spatch, scotch,
Vagina	pussy, c*nt, bearded clam, beaver, cootchie, muff, k*nt, hole, area, breadbasket, vertical smile, magic muscle, cum-hole, cock-pit, passion pit, open wound, garage, love pouch, hot box, seething gash, porcupine, nappy dug-out, tunnel of love, cooter, noony, nanny, snapper, red snapper, whisker box, temple of delight, whisker biscuit, hair pie, fish taco, moist oyster, fun hole, fur burger, choot (in Hindi), magic grail, magic monkey, pink tortelini,
Clitoris	clit, g-spot (some say), clitty, rabbit, love button,
Breasts, Mammary Glands	boobs, knockers, tits, titties, jugs, jubblies, watermelons, shoes, rack, babies, bazookas, the guys, the gals, the girls, the twins, hoo hoo's, puppies, peaches, dirty pillows, jelly doughnuts, ta-tas (nipples), teats, udders, melons, mamme, knock-outs, chi chis, hounds, hooters
Female Arousal	wet, moist
Penis	dick, meat, c*ck, wang, shaft, pecker, peter, jimmy, shlong, dong, unit, rod, pole, cum rocket, sword of passion, salami, winkie, sausage, johnson, ding-a-ling, whanger, tubthumper, fireman, ding dong, flesh rocket, pocket rocket, dingle-dangle, shaboinka, white snake, one-eyed snake, one eyed willy, free willy, tally wacker, purple katana, yogurt slinger, trouser hound, magic wand, dork, skinpencil, elephant trunk, snuffeluphagus, deeder, digit, pee dee, sacred sceptor, mushroom cap, sausage, the club, tuning key, love nozzle, shaft of life, throbbing muscle of love, mommy-daddy button, magic stick, one-eyed wonder weasel,
Testicles, Gonads	balls, nuts, 'nads, family jewels, go-joes, stones,
Erection	boner, bone, hard-on, woody, stiffy, pitching a tent, standing at attention,
Female Homosexual, Lesbian	dyke, butch, carpet muncher, bushwhacker, vegetarian, bush hog, bull dog, vaginaterian, muff diver, flat-cocker,
Male Homosexual, Gay	fag, queer, queen, pillow biter, unstraight, carnivore, fruit cake, light-in-the-loafers, shirt lifter, peter eater, nancy boy, fudge packer, grindle packer, bunger, tail gunner, butt pirate, flamer, ass clown, ass bandit, butt bunny, butt bumper, broken arrow, batty boy, rump ranger, waste hole wanderer, back door bandit, sphincter proder, ring wraith, anal advocate, reverse parker, poof, poofter, woop, woopter, woof, woofter, double adapter, rectum rider, rectum raper, rectum robber, arse bandit, meat browner,
Male Heterosexual, Straight	breeder, fish eater, tuna lover, closet case, in denial,
Female Prostitute	call girl, hooker, whore, ho, street walker,
Male Prostitute	he-whore, he-ho